On a more serious note....

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. James 1:2-4

I can't even begin to count the number of times I have had to remember this lately. While this blog is full of cute stories of the boys and our little adventures so much more is going on behind the scenes. I have so many people in my life going through so much right now. The burdens weigh heavy on my heart. I want to fix things. I want to have the perfect thing to say. I honestly sometimes wish I didn't care so much. I can't believe I just admitted that but I feel the need to be real at the moment. I often lay awake at night thinking, worrying, and analyzing all sorts of "what ifs" in my mind but then......

Philippians 4:6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Okay God - so much easier said than done!

What is even more crazy about this post is that I have had it saved in my drafts for a few days and that Philippians 4:6 is EXACTLY what the sermon was about today . I was going to think about it some more and come back to try and finish what I wanted to say. I so wish I had published this on Friday just to prove the irony of my post. It was even more ironic that the preacher had the exact same after thought on the verse - it is easier said than done to be anxious about nothing. However, I know God in His grace and unconditional love for me understands. He continues to place this verse on my heart to remind me to trust Him.

I am supposed to be thankful in all circumstances. With all that I see going on around me I often find myself wondering if I would be as happy with God if I didn't have my health, my home, my sweet husband and beautiful children. Would I be as thankful to Him if tomorrow he took it all away? I would like to say so but I don't know.

I have someone in my life that I know whose heart towards God has changed because of circumstance. I often wonder myself how so many of these horrible things that happen everyday in this world fit into God's perfect will. It is often too much to even try to think about. However, I also know He never promised us happiness on this earth. He never promised me a successful career, a nice house, health or even people that would never hurt me as long as I was faithful. However, He did promise that someday He would make EVERYTHING BEAUTIFUL in its time. Ecclesiastes 3:11 I realize lately that sometimes that is all I can answer to much of life's complicated questions - HOPE. I think sometimes we feel some sort of control or knowledge to find reasons for all the things we go through and tie them up with a pretty bow but it just isn't that simple. There are so many people that suffer beyond imagination every single day and not a single thing in their head could logically reconcile a purpose in it all if they didn't have HOPE in His promise.

I also know in retrospect I would not change any trial I have been through. I know I am stronger, more compassionate, and closer to the Lord than I know I would have been otherwise. It was always easier to stay away from God when you think you don't need Him.


Dear Lord,
I ask that you give peace to those in my life who are hurting and facing huge trials. I ask you bring them the peace that surpasses all understanding. I pray You remind them of the HOPE they have in You, that I have in You. Thank you for the trials You have placed me in my life too. I pray that you calm my anxious heart. It is 1 am and I am tired yet thinking of so much that keeps me awake late into the night yet again. I come before You as I am, mess and all and give these burdens to You tonight so I can get some sleep. I cannot handle them on my own. None of us can handle any of this on our own. Thank you for your ultimate sacrifice in your precious Son.
In Your Name I Pray,
Amen